Zvemukati
Zuva raValentine rakatenderedza kona, saka inguvai iri nani yekufunga nezvekuvandudza hukama hwako. Sa psychotherapist ane makore anopfuura makumi maviri ane ruzivo, ndine rombo rekushanda pamwe chete nevanhu nevakaroora kuburikidza nedanho rekusimbisa hunyanzvi hwehukama uye nekuvandudza hupenyu hwavo hwepedyo. Hazvishamisi kuti vanhu vanowanzo tsvaga kurapwa vachida kurairwa. Mibvunzo yakaita seiya yakanyorwa pazasi inowanzo taurwa muhofisi yangu yekurapa. Ivo zvakare vanowonekera pandiri kutaura nemumwe munhu panze, wemuhofisi uye ivo vanoona yangu mutsara webasa:
"Imba yangu iri kunetsekana - ndoita sei?"
"Hukama hwangu haugari - ndinotyora sei muenzaniso uyu?"
“Ndeipi kiyi yekuita kuti rudo rwurambe rwuripo?”
"Mukadzi wangu anogara ari pandiri, ndingaita sei kuti adzokere shure?"
Ini ndaigona kuenderera asi iwe unowana mufananidzo. Ini ndinonakidzwa nematambudziko aya mibvunzo aripo uye zvakafanana ndinofarira kana vatapi venhau vasvika nemibvunzo ine chekuita nezvehukama, kutaurirana uye rudo:
"Ndezvipi zvinoratidza kuti hukama hune zvahunotora kuti uende kure?"
"Varume vakaroora vanogunun'una nezvei zvakanyanya pakurapa?"
"Ndezvipi zvikanganiso zvakakura zvinoitwa nevanhu vakaroora?"
Mibvunzo yakaita seiyi inondimanikidza kufunga zvine musoro nezvebasa rangu uye kundidenha kuti ndigadzirise dzidziso dzinogadzirisa maitiro angu ekurapwa. Ndeipi, saka, ndeipi imwe chete yakanakisa chidimbu chehukama kuraira kwachiremba kwaanogona kupa? Mhinduro yacho inoenderana nechikoro chedzidziso icho murapi akadzidziswa. Sezvo ini ndakadzidziswa muhurongwa hwekurapa, ndakagutsikana kuti zano rimwe chete rakakosha randinogona kupa ndere kushandisa zvirevo “ini”!
Usati kumurume wako: “UNONONYA chaizvo uye haumbofi wakandimbundira!” Pane kudaro, iti: "Ndaigona kunyatsombundira." Kana iwe uchida kuenderera mberi uye uchinyatso shanda kuburikidza nehukama hwevakaroora hune hukama padanho rerudo rwemuviri, chera zvishoma zvakadzama muzvikonzero zvinoita zvekusagutsikana kwako. Kana iwe uchinyatsogona kuraira uku, unogona kuzviwana iwe uchitaura chimwe chinhu seichi:
“Kana ndiri munhu akatendeseka chose, ndinofanira kubvuma kuti ndiri munhu anoshuvira muviri. Uye ndinofanirawo kubvuma kuti kunyangwe kumashure patakange tichidanana, ndakaona kuti ndinoichiva padanho rinopfuura nzvimbo yako yekunyaradza. Ini ndaive naïve kufunga kuti kusagadzikana uku kwaizonyangarika kuburikidza nemuchato uye nekufamba kwenguva, uye ndiri kutambura nazvo izvozvi kupfuura nakare kose. "Ndiri kuda kuziva kuti ndozadzisa sei zvandinoda asiwo kuremekedza pfungwa yako yekuwana nzvimbo yako."
Chirevo "Ini" chinogona kutaurirana chero chinhu icho chirevo "iwe" chinogona kutaura, asi nenzira yakanaka isinganyanye kusimudzira kuzvidzivirira uye ingangonzwika. Mumwe wevashandi vangu vepfungwa kurapwa akatsanangura mhedzisiro ine simba yezano iri:
"'Ini' zvirevo ndeangu masimba matsva masimba. Ndakaudza mwanasikana wangu kuti ndaisakwanisa kutenga nhare yaaida pane kumudzidzisa nezve zvemari. Airemekedza zvachose iyi mhinduro. Zvino, ini ndaive kunodya pamwe nemusikana uye varume vaviri vakakumbira kubatana nesu. Panzvimbo pekuvaudza kuti vatore kukwira, ini ndakati '' tavonga zvako, shamwari yangu neni hatina kumboonana kwenguva uye tinonyatsoda nguva yekubata. ' Yakashanda sedumwa. ”
Sei mazwi ekuti "ini" achibudirira?
Kubva pamaonero epfungwa, kuda kutaura nezvako pachako kuratidza kuda kuve neyako chikamu chehukama equation. Mune mamwe mazwi, kunyangwe iwe ukaitika kuva akarurama kuti mumwe wako haasi ane rudo rwepanyama sezvaungave uchida, zvakanakisa kuva neyako uye kuratidza kuda kwako kudiwa pane kungoongorora-zvinoonekwa zvinokanganiswa nemurume wako.
Sisitimu dzidziso inosimbisa kukura kwemanzwiro uye kukura kwemunhu. Iko kugona kuenzanisa kupatsanuka uye kubatana chinhu chakakosha uye chakakosha chikamu chekukura mupfungwa. Zvinoenderana nehurongwa hwesisitimu, chinangwa chepfungwa chekutanga zvine chekuita nehukama hwepedyo ndechekuvandudza kugona kuve nehukama nevamwe panguva imwe chete uchizviona uri wega. Saka kuda kushandura "iwe" zvirevo kuita "ini" zvirevo ndiyo yekutaurirana pakati pehurongwa hwesisitimu. Ndinokuvimbisa kuti chero chirevo mumutauro wako chinogona kugadziridzwa nenzira iyi uye kunowedzera hukama hwako - rudo uye neimwe nzira. Kuzvimanikidza kupuruzira kutaurirana kwese kwepamoyo kune izwi rekuti "iwe" mukutaurirana kunoenderana neshoko rekuti "ini" ndiyo yakanakisa yaValentine yaungapa !!!