Zvemukati
- Chii chinonzi hukama hwehukama?
- 5 hukama hwekunetseka zviratidzo zvinotevera:
- Kushungurudzika uye kwepfungwa
- Zviratidzo zvauri kusangana nekushungurudzika mushure mehukama hune chepfu
- Kuzviremekedza kwako kwakaderera zvachose
- Kusarudza mumwe asina hutano waunofambidzana naye
- Pfungwa dzinotarisa
- Unogona kukumbira ruregerero zvakanyanyisa
- Kushungurudzika kunokanganisa sei hukama
- Maitiro ekuporesa kubva kuhukama hwekutambudzika
- Funga & ita
- Kushivirira ndiyo kiyi
- Rarama mune zviripo
- Tsvaga rubatsiro
- 3 pfungwa dzevanopona mukushungurudzika kwehukama hwakanaka
- 1. Njodzi yakanga isiri yako
- 2. Hukama hausi husina kuchengetedzeka
- 3. Haasi ese makakatanwa chiratidzo chedambudziko
- PTSD, hukama hwehukama, uye mhedzisiro pahukama
Kushungurudzika kwehukama ndeyechokwadi, uye kunogona kuve nemhedzisiro yakaipa. Kunyangwe paine chokwadi chehukama hunoshungurudza, zvinokwanisika kupora, kufambira mberi, uye kusangana nehukama hune hutano zvakare.
Chii chinonzi hukama hwehukama?
Nyanzvi dzakatsanangura kushungurudzika kwehukama sekuitika kana hukama hwepedyo hunosanganisira kushungurudzwa kwepanyama, kwepabonde, kana kwepfungwa. Mumwe munhu akatambura nedambudziko rakadai anowanzo kuve nemanzwiro akasimba uye nekurangarira zviitiko zvekushungurudzika.
Post-inoshungurudza hukama hwehukama hunogona, nekudaro, kuva hunoshamisa kushungurudzika.
5 hukama hwekunetseka zviratidzo zvinotevera:
- Kunzwa kutya zvakanyanya kana kutsamwira kune wawakaroorana naye
- Kunzwa kusachengeteka, izvo zvinogona kutungamira kune hypervigilance uye kushaya hope
- Kuzviparadzanisa nevamwe kubva kune vamwe
- Kusagadzikana uye matambudziko ekusimbisa
- Kutya hukama hwepedyo uye kushaya kuvimba muhukama hwakadai
Kushungurudzika uye kwepfungwa
Apo vanhu pavanofunga nezvekushungurudzika muhukama, vanogona kufunga nezvechisimba chemuviri, asi zvinogona zvakare kusanganisira kushungurudzika kwepfungwa uye kwepfungwa. Semuenzaniso, kubata mumwe wako muchiitiko, kuita kurwa kwakanyanya, kana kunyadziswa nemumwe wako zvese zvinogona kugadzira zviratidzo zvepfungwa uye zvepfungwa.
Kushungurudzika uku kunogona kubva mukushungurudzwa kwepfungwa mukati mehukama. Kushungurudzika kwepfungwa uye kwepfungwa mugumo weimwe yeanotevera maitiro mune hukama hwekushusha:
- Mumwe mudikani anonyadzisa nemaune kana kunyadzisa mumwe wake
- Mumwe waanofambidzana naye achitaura zvinonyadzisa pamusoro pemunhu akakuvara, mungave pachena kana kuti muchivande
- Anoshungurudza shamwari achiparadza mumwe kuzviremekedza
- Mumwe wake achiedza kugonesa mumwe kuti "anopenga"
- Mumwe mudiwa achiudza mumwe zvaari kana zvaasingatenderwe kuita
- Mumwe wako anodzora mari yemumba
- Kugara uchitsoropodzwa kubva kune mumwe wako
- Kutyisidzirwa kwekukuvadzwa kubva kumubati zvisina kufanira
- Mumwe mudhara achipa mumwe mhosva yezvinhu zvinoenda zvisirizvo kana kuita kuti iye mudiwa anzwe aine mhosva yezvinhu zvisiri zvake
Chero ipi yemaitiro epamusoro anogona kukonzera hukama hunoshungurudza. Pakupedzisira, akabatwa anorasikirwa nepfungwa yake yekuvimba uye kuzvimiririra uye anototanga kubvunza pfungwa dzake. Munhu anenge achitambudzwa anogona kunge achitya kukanganisa uye obva afunga kuti hazvigoneke kuti abhinywe afare.
Zviratidzo zvauri kusangana nekushungurudzika mushure mehukama hune chepfu
Mamwe mashoma ezviratidzo zvepamusoro akanyorwa pamusoro, asi zvinobatsira kuve nekunzwisisa kwakazara kwezviratidzo zvekushungurudzika mushure mehukama hunotyisa hungaratidzika senge.
Chimwe chezviratidzo chikuru zvekushungurudzika mushure mehukama, sekutaura kwenyanzvi, ndechekuti iwe unotya hukama hutsva. Unogona kushuvira kutanga hukama hutsva, asi kushushikana kwako kunotadzisa kuti usvetukire kune imwe hukama, kunyangwe mushure mekutora nguva kupora.
Nyaya dzekuvimba ndechimwe chiratidzo chakakosha chekushungurudzika kubva kuhukama hunotyisa.
Kana kushungurudzwa kwehukama hwekare kwakakonzera kushungurudzika, unogona kusazvivimba kuti usarudze mumwe wako. Kunze kwezvo, iwe unogona kuzeza kuvimba mumwe munhu mutsva nekutya kuti uyu munhu anogonawo kuita hutsinye. Izvi zvinogona kukutungamira iwe kupaza muhukama hutsva kana hushamwari hwako.
Semuenzaniso, kusawirirana kudiki kana zvikanganiso zvinogona kukutungamira kuti ubvunze kutendeseka kwemunhu nekuti zvinokuyeuchidza nezvezvikanganiso zvakapfuura zvakaitwa nemumwe wako waaishungurudza.
Zvimwe zviratidzo zvina zvawakasangana nehukama hwehukama zvinotevera:
Ukama hwehukama hwehukama hungashandisa nzira dzekushusha, sekukudzikisira, kukunyadzisa, uye kukupomera mhosva yekuita zvese zvisirizvo. Izvi zvinogona kukutungamira kuti unzwe kusava nebasa, kusagona, uye kusakodzera rudo. Kujekesa padanho iri rekushungurudzika kunogona kukusiya uine hushoma kuzvishingisa.
Nekusaremekedza kuzviremekedza, unogona kusvika pakutenda kuti hauna kukodzera kuve nehukama hune hutano umo mumwe wako anotarisa zvaunoda uye achikubata neruremekedzo. Izvi zvinogona kukutungamira kuti ugamuchire mumwe mudiwa anokonzeresa kushungurudzika.
Dzimwe nguva, unogona kumhanyira kuhukama hutsva nemunhu waanoshungurudza nekuti uri wega uye uchitsvaga kuzadza nzvimbo kana kupora kubva mumaronda ehukama hwako hwekupedzisira. Izvi zvinogona kutungamira mukudzokororwa kutenderera kwekutambudzika.
Muvhidhiyo iripazasi, Dr Treisman vanotaura nezve kukosha kwekuumba hukama hwakanaka uye kuti vakuru vanodawo sei hukama hwehukama:
Chimwe chiratidzo chakakosha ipfungwa dzinokanganisa. Izvi zvinogona kusanganisira kudzokorora nharo dzekare kubva pahukama uye kufunga pamusoro pezvaungadai wakataura kana kuita zvakasiyana, kana kufunga nezvezvikanganiso zvawaimbova mudiwa wako zvakakutungamira kuti utende kuti unazvo. Iwe unogona zvakare kunge uchifungisisa nezve kana vanhu muhupenyu hwako vakavimbika.
Kunyangwe hazvo kunobva mifungo iyi, ivo vanogona kuve vari vekunze uye vanogadzira kushushikana kwakanyanya.
Kana iwe uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchingoitirwa Kana zvirizvo, unogona kuzviwana uchikumbira ruregerero nekuda kwezvikanganiso zvakapusa kana kutokumbira ruregerero pazvinenge zvisina basa.
Kushungurudzika kunokanganisa sei hukama
Nehurombo, hukama hwehukama hunogona kutungamira kune asina kunaka mapatani kana macircle muhukama.
Izvi zvinodaro nekuda kwenzira iyo uropi hwakanamirwa. Sekutsanangura kwakaita nyanzvi dzezvepfungwa, nekudzokorora kushungurudzika, tinowedzera kuva nehanya nemhedzisiro yekushungurudzika. Izvi zvinodaro nekuti kana tikasazopora kubva mukushungurudzika, iyo wiring muuropi inochinja, ichikonzera isu kutanga "kupona kupindura" kana tichinzwa kutyisidzirwa.
Mhinduro yekupona inokonzeresa kuita kubva muhuropi inonzi iyo amygdala, zvichikonzera isu kurwa kana kuva nemanzwiro. Kupona kwehuropi kwakasimba zvekuti tinogona kuona kusawirirana kwehukama sekutyisidzira kurarama kwedu.
Kana isu tisingashandise uye kupora kubva mukushungurudzika muhukama, shanduko zhinji dzinoitika mukati medu izvo zvinokanganisa hukama.
- Isu tinonzwisisa zvekuti chero gakava kana mamiriro ezvinhu anotiyeuchidza nezvedambudziko anogona kuputika, sekudaidzira kana kurwa.
- Vamwe vanhu vanogona kusarwa asi panzvimbo pezvo vhara pasi uye vobvisa kana mhinduro yehupenyu hwehuropi ichiitwa.
- Izvo zvinotungamira kune yakashata maitiro maitiro.
- Kuenderera mberi kunetsana muhukama
Ngatitii, kana iwe uchinzwa kutyisidzirwa kana kurambwa muhumwe hukama zvekuti unotanga kubuda kana kurwisa pachiratidzo chekutanga chekunetseka, muhukama hwako hunotevera, unogona kuona zvikanganiso zvekutendeseka kana kukakavara kudiki sekutyisidzira, uyezve, kupenga kune mumwe wako mutsva. Izvi zvinogadzira pateni yakashata.
Mhinduro yekushungurudzika inogona zvakare kugadzira yakashata pateni mune inoshusha hukama, nokudaro ichienderera mberi yehukama hwekutambudzika kutenderera.
Semuenzaniso, kana iwe wajaira kunzwa uchityisidzirwa nekurambwa nemumwe wako kana zvinyadzo, uropi hwako hunogona kunyanyisa kunetseka kutambudzika.
Izvi zvinoreva kuti kunyangwe kana mumwe wako asiri kuzvibata nenzira inotyisidzira, unogona kuona kurambwa kana kupokana wotanga kuita kune mumwe wako. Izvi zvinogadzira kunetsana kunoramba kuripo uye inova yakaipa maitiro mukati mehukama.
Nekufamba kwenguva, zvinogona kukonzera kuti utarise hukama hwese zvisirizvo. Unogona kuzonzwa sekunge kuti hapana waunovimba naye, saka unozvibvisa kana kupopota kuti uzvidzivirire. Izvi zvinogona kukuvadza chero hukama uye zvinotungamira kune yakasarudzika isina hutano, isingafare hukama hwepedyo.
Maitiro ekuporesa kubva kuhukama hwekutambudzika
Nepo hukama hwehukama huchigona kuumba zviratidzo zvinoshungurudza uye zvisina kunaka mapatani, zvinokwanisika kudzoreredza uropi uye kupora kubva mukushungurudzika. Zvinoenderana nenyanzvi dzekushungurudzika, huropi hwevanhu vakuru hunogona kuzvigadzirisa pachahwo mushure mekutambudzika. Izvi zvinoda kuti iwe udzidzise tsika nyowani kana kufunga nezvezvinhu zvakasiyana.
Kugadziriswa kwekushungurudzika kwehukama, nekudaro, kunoda kushandira pane kwako. Izvi zvinogona kureva kuti iwe unofanirwa kumbomira usati wapindura panguva yekukakavara kana kukakavara.
Panzvimbo pekukurumidza kuita, ungatofanira kuzvirovedza kuti utore chinguva kuti uongorore kuti uri panjodzi chaiyo here kana kuti iyi ingori nharo yenguva dzose. Nekufamba kwenguva, maitiro aya anofanirwa kuwedzera otomatiki sezvo huropi hunopora.
Kana iwe wafunga kuramba uri muhukama zvisinei nekusangana nemhedzisiro yekushungurudzika, uchafanirwa kunge wakagadzirira kuve nemoyo murefu kune mumwe wako.
Pakutanga, unogona kusanzwa zvakanaka nezve nzira yekurapa, asi paunoona mumwe wako achiita shanduko, unotanga kunzwa zvirinani nekufamba kwenguva.
Kana iwe uri kuita mukugadzirisa, zvakakosha kuti iwe utarise pane zviripo uye kufambira mberi, pane kuvhenekera pakurwadziwa kwakapfuura. Sezvo iwe uchivaka nyowani yakanaka mapatani neumwe wako, positivity ichave iyo yakajairwa.
Kana iwe uchiri wakagadziriswa pane zvakapfuura, iwe unogona nyore kudzoka zvakare mune zvisina kunaka macircuit, ndosaka zvichikosha kuti titarise pane zvakanaka shanduko dzinoitika mune inozvino.
Pakupedzisira, kana iwe ukaona iwe usingakwanise kupora kubva mukushungurudzika uri wega, ungangoda kutsvaga zano.
Ngatiti uri kuzviwana wakabatirirwa mukutenderera kwekuona hukama zvisina kunaka uye uchiita nehunhu hwako hwekupona kunyangwe ukatarisana nemakakatanwa madiki. Muchiitiko ichocho, inogona kunge iri nguva yekutora chikamu kune mumwe nemumwe kuraira kuti akubatsire kupora kubva pazviri.
Kana iwe uri kunetseka nekutambudzika mukati mehukama hwehukama, kurairana kwevakaroorana kunogona kubatsira iwe nemumwe wako kutanga nzira dzine hutano dzekudyidzana.
3 pfungwa dzevanopona mukushungurudzika kwehukama hwakanaka
Munguva yese yekugadzirisa kushungurudzika, zvinobatsira kune vakapona kuti vachengete dzimwe pfungwa dzakakosha mundangariro. Heano matatu epamusoro:
1. Njodzi yakanga isiri yako
Vakapona pahukama hunoshungurudza kazhinji vakaitwa kuti vatende kuti vanopenga kana kuti havana kukodzera kudiwa. Izvi zvinogona kuita kuti vafunge kuti ivo neimwe nzira vaifanirwa kushungurudzwa uye kuti kushungurudzika imhosva yavo.
Izvi hazvimbofi zvakaitika. Hapana munhu ane kodzero yekukushungurudza, uye uyo anoshungurudza anozvidavirira pane zvaanoita.
2. Hukama hausi husina kuchengetedzeka
Kana iwe ukaitwa pasi pehukama hunoshungurudza, kunyanya paichienderera mberi, unogona kutanga kutenda kuti hukama hwese hwakashata, hunoshusha, kana hwakazara nekukonana. Izvi hazvisizvo. Izvo zvinokwanisika kuve nehukama hune hutano hwakasununguka kubva mukuregererwa.
3. Haasi ese makakatanwa chiratidzo chedambudziko
Zvakawanda senge iwe ungangotanga kuona hukama hwese husina kunaka, dzokorora kushungurudzika kunogona kukonzera kuti iwe utende kuti kukakavara kwese kutyisidzira kana chiratidzo chedambudziko. Izvi zvakare hazvisi zvechokwadi.
Kumwe kunetsana kunotarisirwa muhukama hwakanaka, uye hazvireve kuti iwe unofanirwa kurwisa, kudzoka, kana kunzwa kusachengeteka. Zvakaoma kusanzwa kutyisidzirwa kana gakava raive nehuturu munguva yakapfuura, asi iwe unogona kudzidza nzira nyowani dzekufunga nezvekupokana, saka unokwanisa kupindura zvine musoro.
Kuchengeta pfungwa dziri pamusoro apa paunenge uchienda kumberi kubva mukushungurudzika kunogona kukubatsira iwe kutanga nzira nyowani dzekufunga nezvehukama. Nekudaro, iwe unozozvitarisa uye hukama mune yakajeka, zvichikutungamira iwe kuti uwane hukama hwakanaka mune ramangwana.
PTSD, hukama hwehukama, uye mhedzisiro pahukama
Izvo zvakakosha kuti uzive mutsauko uripakati pekushungurudzika kwepashure kwekutambudzika (PTSD) uye kushungurudzika kwehukama. PTSD inoonekwa sehutano hwepfungwa mamiriro umo munhu anogona kuzvinanzva kuti arege kudzoka pachiitiko chinotyisa.
Post-traumatic relationship syndrome (PTRS), kune rimwe divi, inowanzo sanganisira vanhu vane hukama hwehukama zvakanyanya, vachiita kuti iratidze zvakasiyana nePTSD.
Mumwe munhu ane PTSD anowanzo kudzivirira kushungurudzika, nepo mumwe munhu ane trauma achizoita tsika yekudzora kushungurudzika kusvika padanho rekukuvara.
Dzimwe nguva vanhu vanogona kuona PTSD nePTRS kunge zvakafanana, asi hazvina kufanana zvachose.
PTRS inogona kunge iine zvimwe zvinhu zvePTSD, asi iri mamiriro akapatsanuka, kunyanya sezvo isiri yepamutemo inozivikanwa yehutano hwepfungwa uye inowanzo sangana nezvose zvinoonekwa zvePTSD. Vamwe vanhu vanogona kufunga nezvePTRS sePTSD kubva pahukama.
PTSD uye hukama hwehukama hunogona kuunza zvinokuvadza pahukama.
Semuenzaniso, mumwe munhu arikurwara nePTSD anogona kurota hope dzinotyisa kana kumbofunga nezvechiitiko chinotyisa, kusangana nekushushikana kwakadai sekushatirwa kana kutya, otanga kurega kubva kuzviito zvakajairwa kana kuzvibvisa kune vamwe. Iyi mhedzisiro inonzwisisika inokuvadza hukama.
Munhu ane PTSD anogona kubva kune waanodanana naye kana kuita zvehasha nekuda kwekungoramba uchinetseka mafungiro.
Kushungurudzika kwakadai kunotungamira kumatambudziko ehukama, asi rudzi urwu rwekushungurudzika runowanzo kukonzera zvakanyanya kukanganiswa pahukama, sekunge kuburikidza nemhedzisiro inotevera:
- Kunzwa kutsamwira mumwe wako
- Kubatika mune yakashata kutenderera kwekudyidzana muhukama
- Kusina kuvimba muhukama
- Kurega panguva yekukonana
- Kunzwa kutyisidzirwa nezvikanganiso zvidiki kana kusawirirana nemumwe wako
- Kufuridzira mumwe wako pamusoro pezvinhu zvinoita sezvidiki
Kana iwe uri kurarama nemhedzisiro yehukama kushungurudzika, nyaradzwa nekuziva iwe unogona kupora. Hukama hune hutano mushure mekushungurudzika zvinogoneka kana iwe wakazvipira kudzidza nzira nyowani dzekufunga uye kusvika kunehukama hwako.
Kana iwe uchinetseka nekuporesa uri wega, murapi kana chiremba wepfungwa ane hunyanzvi mukuporesa anogona kukubatsira iwe kuenda kumberi.